For some reason, as I was driving today and listening to the radio, I started to think about what the world would be like if we all just said what we meant. I know that I was thinking about the talk I recently had with my singing teacher. I had just completed a singing exam and I knew that I still wanted to take lessons and I also knew that I wanted my lessons to be different.
I had prepared myself for the possible outcomes of our talk. He would give me the information I needed and he would be willing to accommodate my needs OR he would give me the information but not be willing to accommodate my needs OR he would tell me that it had been a ‘slice’ but it was time to end my lessons with him. I know that I had prepared myself to be told that our connection was over. To be ready for the worst outcome is such an old strategy for me. And I felt some trepidation in initiating our discussion about ‘what next’ AND I still chose to say what I needed – calmly, quietly, clearly, and without hiding mySelf.
Interesting that when we started to talk, he seemed concerned about what I was going to say. Here I had been worried about what his response would be to what I knew I needed to say for me and he had been worried about what I was going to say as a reflection of him.
Today, as I was thinking back to my conversation with my teacher, I started to think what the world would be like if everyone in it said exactly what they meant and spoke their truth clearly and did not hide behind words. And I thought about when and how I had learned to monitor what I said. I know that I grew up thinking that I had to be careful what I said and how I said it. Heaven forefend that I should annoy anyone else or offend them! How dare I ask for what I want! How selfish of me to say what I mean without concern for hurting someone else’s feelings! Where did I get off thinking I had the right to put mySelf first in anything!
And I realized today that every time that I was careful about what I said and how I said it, every time I did not say what I truly thought, every time that I put concern for and about others’ responses before mySelf, I lost a part of who I truly am. I’m no spring chicken here and I shudder to think about how much of my true self I had lost just by being careful of my words! To me, it is no wonder that eventually I had not one clue who I was and what I needed in order to live a life that truly is a reflection of my authentic self.
Now I know that each time I say what I mean and speak my truth and let my needs be known without side or fear or anger but with directness and clarity, I reclaim a part of my true self that I had lost over the years of old habits and strategies and ways of dealing with others. Every day, in every way, things get better and better. I know who I truly AM. It’s like some part of me is saying, “Hi, Jean. Let me introduce you to Jean.” every time I say what I mean. I’m meeting mySelf at a cosmic, quantum level every time I am true to who I know mySelf to be — not just in my actions but in my words.
Think about it. What would the world look like, feel like if we all chose to say what we really mean and speak from our truth all the time? What if we all spoke without hidden agendas but with clarity of intention? I cannot see what the world would look like but, oh, I can feel it. AND the possibilities for each of us to live our truth individually and together are infinite. And, oh, what a wonderful world this would be!